WANTING TO SEE OTHERS FAIL - IS THIS WRONG?
Wanting to see others fail, and whether or not this is wrong
is a question that I was recently asked to answer. It is an interesting
question, and there are several components about it that are relevant to
WHAT IS RIGHT OR WRONG ANYWAY?
I am not a strong believer in the idea of “right” or “wrong”
when it comes to the realm of thoughts, feelings and desires.
The biggest question for me is: “How does it feel to think
that?” In some cases, maybe it feels better than the alternative.
For example, maybe
the person you are wanting to see fail is a friend who stole a business idea
from you. In this case, wanting to see them fail evokes feelings of revenge or
vindication, which are more empowered, and therefore more positive feelings
than feelings of defeat or being a victim.
A HABIT OF WANTING TO SEE OTHERS FAIL
However, if wanting to see others fail is a general habit,
this is usually a choice of focus which is dis-empowering, and at a core level
never feels very good. For most of us, we know that love and appreciation feel
way better than bitterness or jealousy, and the latter emotions are often at
the basis of wanting to see others fail.
Wanting to see others fail is very often based on a deep
feeling that we are unable for some reason to achieve the success we want
ourselves. Believing that you cannot have something you want brings really
awful feelings, such as powerlessness, inadequacy or inferiority.
MOVING IN A BETTER DIRECTION
When we are experiencing really negative emotions, it is not
only a natural human reaction to try and make ourselves feel better, it is
actually a really positive thing. If you are feeling despair, and you can focus
in a way that Abraham Hicks says “Moves you up the emotional scale,” into blame
or revenge, then you are moving in the right direction.
TO KEEP MOVING IS THE KEY
The trick is though, not to stay in these feelings of
revenge too long, as they are still pretty negative feelings. Instead of
focusing on what someone else is doing or not doing, achieving or not achieving,
try placing your attention on things that are far more beneficial to you.
really helpful place to focus is on making the move from blame or revenge
towards more empowering feelings such as hope or optimism about what is
possible for you.
a final word
If you have the tendency of wanting to see others fail, don’t
beat up on yourself about it, but do think about how this perspective makes you
feel, and as a result impacts the quality of your life.
Back to Mindsettable Home Page From Wanting to See Others Fail
To find balance in our lives allows us to acknowledge and deal with obstacles as well as noticing and appreciating the blessings and opportunities life offers.
Wanting to see others fail, and whether this is wrong is an interesting question, and there are several components about it that are relevant to consider.
Thinking big opens up unlimited possibilities and allows you to create a blueprint for building a reality that will thrill you.