selectively observing reality

Selectively observing reality does not mean burying our heads in the sand and ignoring issues or emotions that truly need our attention. It simply means choosing to place the majority of our attention on the parts of reality that we like and want more of, rather than endlessly noticing the things that we don’t like or want in our lives and the world around us.

Selectively observing reality allows us to direct our focus and our actions in a way that can produce the most effective results, and to avoid feeding energy to things we do not want to experience.


If there is something that needs to be done in order to allow a part of your current reality to function better, and that action presents itself clearly to you, then take action.

If, however, you are feeling stuck or trapped in a reality that you are not happy with, dwelling endlessly on this reality is not going to do you any good. In fact, the more attention that you pay to a situation, the more you are reinforcing it, giving it power and prominence in your existence, and the more stuck you wind up feeling.

THE power OF focus

The more that we focus on anything in our lives, the more pronounced it becomes. As Abraham Hicks says, “Any time you are talking, you are affirming- you are making it firmer.”

While the natural reaction that most of us have is to simply notice and talk about what is going on around us, this continual noticing is not helpful if what we are noticing is stuff we don’t want.

If we want to allow the things we don’t like to gradually die off from lack of oxygen, we need to stop fanning their flames with our attention by developing the skill of selectively observing reality.

It often feels very unnatural to turn our focus to the things that make us feel better, rather than allowing ourselves to dwell on problems. Dwelling on problems is such an ingrained habit for just about all of us, but if we want to allow the things that we do like and want to grow and flourish, then we need to learn to discipline our habits of thought.

WHen to leave unwell enough alone

The principles of the serenity prayer can be applied very effectively to observing reality in a way that allows you to tend to the things that can currently be tended to, and to stop focusing on things that are best left alone.

Courage to take action in the things that can be tended to by direct action, serenity to leave those things that action and willpower will not change alone, and the wisdom to know the difference is what we can benefit from when selectively observing reality.

The things that are best left alone are the things that seem to be currently out of your power to change. This does not mean that they can’t be changed, simply that thinking about them and how much you don’t like them is achieving the opposite result to that which you desire (for them to transform or go away).

thE benefits of selectively observing reality

As we practice selectively observing reality, it actually becomes easier and easier. Not only because we get better at doing it, but because gradually reality changes to offer us more and more of what we are observing, and less and less of what we are neglecting to observe.

The other great thing about selectively observing reality is that even when nothing has changed in the external circumstances, because you are focused on what is going on around you that you like, you get to feel better right now. And the bonus is when you practice feeling better for long enough, you create better vibes for drawing more good stuff into your reality, and it becomes an upward spiral instead of a downward one.

Recent Articles

  1. Find Balance In An Uncertain World

    To find balance in our lives allows us to acknowledge and deal with obstacles as well as noticing and appreciating the blessings and opportunities life offers.

    Read More

  2. Wanting to See Others Fail

    Wanting to see others fail, and whether this is wrong is an interesting question, and there are several components about it that are relevant to consider.

    Read More

  3. Thinking Big Can Make Big Things Happen

    Thinking big opens up unlimited possibilities and allows you to create a blueprint for building a reality that will thrill you.

    Read More